The Smile of A Heartbreaker

“I don’t love you……can’t love you. We are very good friends but that is the farthest I am ready to go…..” These were the words going into my ears, but my brain was hearing completely different, “I don’t love you…. never will, Being a friend of your’s is all I can take. You are just not worth more of my time.”

1. I was ready to beg right there, in the middle of the road. But then it happened, she smiled! And everything I had gone through the last two days; all the mental turmoil, the soliloquies, the self-consultations, the fear stabbing at my heart like a blunt knife, the sleeplessness; everything was forgotten in that instant. I was standing getting drenched in the first showers of the season. She was standing beside me looking at something over my shoulder, twirling the umbrella in her hands spraying me with water even more. A lightning flashed, and she instinctively hunched towards me, at that moment, my heart felt like that blunt knife stabbing at it had finally been able to pierce it. And I was introduced to a new emotion…................

Sadness… Profound and Complete! My heart was screaming, telling me to scream till something forced me to stop. I had broken all self-made promises and all self-imposed rules. I wanted to tell her all the unsaid things; her ego, her vanity, her selfishness, her treating me as a friendly stranger, except when she needed help. But all that bubbled from the depths of my screaming despair was, “As you wish…..”
And she turned away, giving me a last look out of the corner of her eye. And I was left to walk back alone, getting even more drenched, finally understanding the need to cry in the rain as my eyes mimicked the dark cloudy sky. Playing and re-playing that last smile in my mind.... The smile of a heartbreaker,,,,. 

HERO

She stared into the eyes of a dying man. And for the first time she saw something, veiled by all the pain and suffering he had recently suffered. Just a tiny glimpse….. the reason for all the pain he had and was  enduring, the reason why there was a gaping wound at his side. And which left her speechless……

   

     Yoshi was a dreamer, always had been since childhood. He lived constantly in a world of dragons, castles, misty woodlands, dangerous quests, treasure caves and all the rest of the fairytale clichés. He also had a Princess, and he considered it his duty and honour in protecting her body and soul. This protectiveness soon blossomed into a deep love. 

However he was so inadvertently shy, he could never really express himself properly to Gina,his beloved Princess. And Gina, being a girl, remained oblivious to the real intentions behind Yoshi’s protectiveness, and saw him as the doting elder brother her own brother never could be.

   

The year, when Gina turned 18 and Yoshi 21, was one of great events. The Satsuma-Choshu alliance was forged to restore Japan to Imperial rule. The Tokugawa Shogunate realised that the time for it to pass into history had slowly but surely arrived. At this point of time, Buddhism and Shintoism were the two major religions of Japan. The seeds of Christianity had been sowed three centuries earlier by St. Francis Xavier. Though they still remained a niche community, they had grown in number enough to be taken into account, by the time of the Meiji Restoration.

    Gina’s days passed as unobtrusively as possible in this time of great events. Only the hours spent with Yoshi did not seem to be dull to her. Then came Jack Ichihiro and threw her serene world into stormy turmoil.

     

   She pushed the strong, sinewy body away from her and leaned back on a tree-trunk. She was breathless but felt exhilarated. It was her first kiss! Her honey-brown eyes were swimming with unfathomable emotions, wanting but not daring to ask for more. She looked at the handsomely arrogant face, and still couldn’t quite comprehend the depth of the bottomless pit of emotions welling inside of her. The feelings within her chest seemed alien, as if she had stolen them from someone else and hidden them there. But they had injected her with some kind of adrenaline, making her bolder, reckless. Sometimes dangerously so!  Jack came close to her and ran a finger down her cheek sending shivers down her spine. It had been two weeks since they had first professed their mutual feelings, and had started meeting in secret. Even Yoshi didn’t know about this, but she would tell him herself, soon….very soon…..

   It was almost sunset, and as the sunlight filtered through the many leaves it gave everything a golden halo. Yoshi stood on the edge of the clearing, waiting. She emerged from the darkening foliage, like a forest nymph coming out of hiding. As she moved into the light, Yoshi felt the breath catch in his chest, like always. But when he noticed another figure rustling in the shrubbery, a dull throb started in his heart which erupted in a raging volcano as Jack Ichihiro emerged into the gathering twilight.

       It had been three days since he had come to know about their affair, two days since Jack’s sister was kidnapped and then found dead, with a ‘warning’ note around her neck, a single day since he had taken them to the old, abandoned  hut in the middle of the forests some distance from town. He needed to act fast, Gina’s father would have come to know about the hut by now, he himself had made sure of that. The plan was to escape to the river, from where a boat would take them to the coast to a ship setting sail for Korea. No sooner did the boat slip into the water, than men burst through the trees, waving battle-axes and samurai swords. Without a word Yoshi leaped to the shore slashed through the first wave. Before even the onslaught could be registered, Yoshi was back in the boat rowing away in fury. As the twilight gave way to darkness, they suddenly heard the silent swishing of oars uncomfortably close by. Yoshi stood up to peer behind them, and an arrow struck his left side. He collapsed lurching the boat off-balance.Gina persuaded Jack to beach the boat, and they half-carried, half-dragged Yoshi into the dense jungle. They weren’t far from the coast but with one of their party unable to walk, the going was agonizingly slow. When they couldn’t carry him any longer, they set Yoshi down against a tree. His breath had become ragged, and a lot of blood had also flown from his body. Gina saw that the arrowhead was still embedded in his side. With a mighty pull she tugged the arrowhead free and then tried to staunch the fresh flow of blood with her small delicate hands. The yellowing skin around the wound opening confirmed her fears of the arrow being poisoned. 

    Jack was nowhere in sight, but  Gina was too preoccupied with Yoshi to even notice his absence. As she was tying a piece of cloth torn from her own robe as bandage, Yoshi placed a bloody hand on her’s and pulled her forward, “ If I can’t have you in my life, its not worth living anymore…” he gasped. And before even realising what she was doing, she was enveloped in a passionate kiss with him. Those new feelings and sensations that were still young and raw in her threatened to burst their dams, but at that moment Yoshi pushed her away. Gina continued to stare into Yoshi’s dark eyes, swimming with emotions long suppressed, long unexpressed, true feelings of a man whose heart had been broken beyond repair. She was too shocked to look anything but dumbfounded. She remembered all the things Yoshi had done for her all throughout their lives. And now understood, it wasn’t a simple friend or a brother helping her out. The reasons went much, much deeper than she could have ever imagined.

   She sat there and let herself be immersed deeper into those dark pools of untold promises and unsaid vows. Her reverie was broken by the arrival of Jack, saying that they needed to hurry, the coast wasn’t much farther nor were the men behind them. Jack helped Yoshi up and they continued on their path. With Yoshi just managing to hobble behind, and Gina looking forlorn.

            It was autumn and the pink blossoms were a-bloom! 

       The air was heavy with a sweet fragrance. It helped to soothe their frayed nerves and mend their souls. But they continued on, reluctantly. On reaching the coast, they saw a boat on the shore waiting to take them onboard the ship floating in the distance. Jack got into the boat first, Gina turned to Yoshi, wanting to say something but even her eyes were unable to convey anything as she felt herself suddenly devoid of any feeling. “I couldn’t be your lover,”, she whispered into Yoshi’s chest as they hugged,” but I promise you’ll be the hero I tell my grandchildren about.........”

      They were on the boat, watching Yoshi fall behind. Suddenly from the forest edge, out tumbled a mass of men, Yoshi fell upon them as a boulder and crushed them all. He supported himself on his sword and tried to raise his hand in a final farewell. Suddenly a man with a long bow emerged from the thickets, and let fly an arrow. It whizzed though the air, burst through Yoshi’s bosom, and kept travelling even after that. It cut through Gina’s long hair as she ducked, and she heard it strike wood behind her. When she looked behind, Jack Ichihiro was pinned to the mast, with the arrow through his neck……

   

Gina's elder brother looked on, with a mixture of utter sadness and elation, as the boat disappeared over the horizon and a blood-drenched sun set on the Age of The Samurai in the Land of The Rising Sun………. 

INDEX OF A DEATH

     As the spattering raindrops made their way down the window-pane, my eyes followed their watery trail. It is so hard to forget things you dearly want to. The cherished memories of the past fast become the present’s gateways to insanity.

      I remember her, as she stood in front of me. So vibrant. So lively. So full of life. So beautiful….. in her flower-printed dress and straw hat, her lips giving me that dimpled smile I fell in love with her for. Her hair flowing….buffeted by a non-existent breeze. Her eyes, the delicious colour of honey. That’s how I remember her. The last time I saw her

….alive.

    

       My memory suddenly fast-forwards. I was entering an unbearably cold room with the ostentatious smell of chemicals attacking my nostrils. The doctor was younger than me, but he was rock steady. Anyway it wasn’t him who had gone deathly pale on being surrounded by cadavers, one of whom was the love I’d give my life for. I was led to those tables having the fresh arrivals in the morning, the spotless white sheet stained with a fresh red. He removed one of the sheets, and I stared down at her ageless beauty. She was so serene, so lovely….even in death, that Hades would have a hard time keeping his hands off her. Her skin felt icy-cold and unresponsive as I caressed a finger down her cheek. My eyes came to rest at her forehead. There right between her eyes was the bullet-hole….

Made by the bullet from my gun.

    A thunder-clap and  lightning flash breaks my reverie. To clear my head, I look down, and notice, on my right hand, the stub of skin and muscle where once an index finger stood. Justice is always brought to the culprit, even if that culprit is only an index finger…………

The Fire Spitter

        The dusty town grew even more so, as a Dust Devil enveloped it. It was almost dusk when the watch-out noticed something, he gave one sharp whistle, audible even over the howling winds, and the streets filled with people almost instantly. The orange sun was looming large over the horizon, when a horse came into view. The sun behind it and dust swirling all around it gave it somewhat of a mythical look.

As the horse came closer, they saw that it was on its death-throes, and also it had no rider, only a lumpy package on its saddle. Suddenly the horse faltered and stumbled to the ground just on the edge of town. The blanket covering the package got thrown off in the process. As they gathered around, the people saw, two two year-olds, strapped securely together, fast asleep. The Village Headman checked the horse and found the Emperor’s Mark, Even the twins had them on their forearm, ‘The Fire-spitting Dragon’. He raised his hands to the sky as if in dismay, and said a silent prayer to the Departed. Turning to the townspeople, he said, ‘ We have lost the War. The world shall be overrun by the worshippers of The Dark Shadow. But we have the burning splinters, which can bring back light to this dark world. It is upon us to preserve it!’

The Return of The Empire

                

       

         The setting sun cast a red glow over the entire vista. Standing on the high plateau, two swordsmen stared into each other’s eyes. One was a tall, fair-haired, blue-eyed man who exuded an air of coolness. The other one was of medium height and dark hair and his eyes were burning with an intense green fire. It was obvious from his clenched fists that he was just about to let fury take over his sanity, An eagle flying overhead shrieked, and something snapped. The two men clashed and dematerialized, next second they were in another position, the next second in another. It was as if they were teleporting all over the expanse of the plateau. At one point they sprang apart. The fair one had a long broadsword, held in the ninja stance, while the dark-haired one held something like rapiers in both his hands, but with much stouter bodies. The eagle screamed again and the fight began anew. They both knew that only one of them would be walking away from this fight alive and towards his freedom. As they continued to attack each other, each maneuver was greeted by a thousand-throated roar, demanding only one action, ‘Kill! Kill! Kill!’…..

     The year, circa. 3450  A.D. The two fighters were gladiators. The place, ‘The New Colosseum’. Juan Caesar looked on from atop his High box and smiled. It felt good to be a Roman citizen again………

Deadly Beauty

 I sat with my chin cupped in my hand and saw all the ceremonies taking place according to schedule. Today was my beloved’s marriage…to the man of her dreams. Which incidentally could have been me….if I hadn’t died at the most miss-opportune

moment………..

      

       There I was standing at one of the bus-stops overflowing with humanity, waiting for a bus overflowing with more of Humanity’s sorry examples. At last a bus came along which would take me to my destination but however much I tried, couldn’t add my mass to that of the already bloated mass in the bus. Suddenly the jacket of my outstretched arm snagged onto some kind of flannel material. Only when the bus started pulling away did I realize that the material was part of a odni of a salwar-kameez suit. I tried to un-snag myself but the speeding bus took my arm with it and the rest of my body hesitatingly followed. Now just imagine the sight, a 20-something young man running beside a bus with an outstretched arm through one of the world’s  most densely populated cities, whose streets are even more densely populated by smoke-belching monsters on four wheels! When the bus stopped at another bus-stop almost a kilometer away, my attempts at untangling myself drew the attention of the owner of the salwar-kameez owner.She turned with a frown one reserves only for an eve-teaser. On seeing my genuine distress, she helped me as much as possible, read – salvaged her odni as much as possible, after I had freed my arm I felt the necessity to look up at my source of my torment, and I looked into the startling green eyes of an angel. 

      As I stepped back from the bus her eyes followed me. They were a clear green, like that of a virgin meadow. And they were sparkling with laughter. But her lips did not seem to want to comply, they maintained their hard, displeased line. Suddenly something hit my right side and I was flung away.As I fell on the hard tarmac, cracking my skull, I was cursing myself, 'Foolish idiot! Standing and staring at an unknown girl in the middle of the road, and at peak hour too.Well I deserved what I got!'. As I tried to take a last glance at the girl who had taken my breathe away, literally, I saw the bus going past me and searched for her eyes, which weren't even looking at me.
          
        Fast-forward to today and here I am balancing effortlessly on top of a lamp-post watching her get into that imported SUV, with her just wedded husband. She looks very happy, because she doesn’t really know what was in store for her, I thought with a crooked smile. RGV is going to get material for a new film……………  

WiNdOwS.......................

        The green carpet stretched on as far as the eye could see......and beyond. He closed his eyes and relished the feeling of the soft grass crunching underneath his feet. He didn't need to open his eyes to see the white clouds swimming across the periwinkle blue sky, he could just feel it from the way the wind was brushing against his body.....He heaved a sigh! 

How long will he continue to fool himself with this illusion, he said to himself. He reluctantly, slowly blinked his eyes open. He was sitting in a darkened room, strapped heavily to a wheelchair. The only source of light, was the monitor screen in front of him. The desktop wallpaper was that of a virgin green meadow stretching to eternity accompanied by a blue sky dotted with white clouds. He blinked and spoke a few short commands and the wallpaper changed to that of a serene blue lagoon, with an island with white sand beaches and palm trees in the background.
      This had become his daily routine since he had been released from hospital two months ago after that incident. This had now become his hobby, his pass-time and his one reason to continue to keep breathing. He sighed raggedly, closed his eyes and treaded water.........